Teresa Henke | Life Inspired
I’m so excited to share this installment of my portrait project, Life Inspired! This project showcases portraits of women who have moved past living a life filled with fear and self-doubt to living a life full of love and hope. Read more about it HERE, and let me know if there is someone you think would be perfect to include in this project!
The woman you are about to meet is Teresa, and she’s living proof that when you let go of fear you can have a life full of abundance and love. She is a wife and a mother of three, with another little one on the way! She's just so vibrant and engaging; it’s apparent even upon first meeting her, that her life is full of love!
I am so honored to be able to share this amazing woman’s story with you! So without further ado, Teresa…
When did you realize your life was being held back by fear or self-doubt, and what kept you from moving forward?
My life was a prison and I didn't even know it. In 2015 I was a working mom, with a "sexy" career as a medical device sales rep working in the operating room and earning well into the 6 figures and accolades from my mostly male counterparts and higher ups. I lived with the attitude that "I" was special in some sense and that the rules of what could or could not be done and the guidelines with which to accomplish something just did not apply to Teresa Lee Henke. I honestly believed that by earning more money, working more hours, and running more miles I was unlocking the secret to having a life others only dreamed of. (And at the time, what others thought and believed about me was paramount.) Living that world is not only dangerous, it’s delusional. I had virtually no relationship with my husband, but yet wanted another baby. I barely saw my 2 toddlers that were one and three, but I believed that providing them more material things, I was somehow being a "good mom". To top it all off, I thought that literally running myself skinny and living off coffee and peanut butter crackers was getting me the healthy, lean body I had always achieved. I was so wrong. We had built our beautiful dream home, but 6 months after the closing, our dreams were not coming true. The mortgage alone was more than we could afford and the bills that came along side it were more than my salary plus monthly commission would cover. Not to mention the cost of childcare in our new town. We began to slowly drown in fear, regret, self-doubt, and debt. It was not at all what we were showing to the outside world and I don't even believe we were seeing it for what it really was.
What triggered you to no longer live a life of fear or self-doubt?
The pivotal point in my life was January 23, 2015. I was invited by a friend to have lunch and hear about what I thought was another fad diet. She took the initiative to call and ask me what I was doing and I'm an honest person and that day it was....nothing. So, I went and thought, "At least I get to have lunch with real people today" and that was a win, that’s how isolated my days were working the way I did in the job I had. But that lunch meeting wasn't what I thought at all. A genuine lovely woman, named Jessica, who was casual and down to earth sat across from me and told me her story. It wasn't glamorous or involved hours of grinding with the outcome of making millions and being thin and gorgeous. It was real. She didn't disguise the ugly parts, she just let them be. She was brave and bold and told her story with conviction that I began to believe could be the change I needed in my life. She started a spark in me that led me to the life I'm living now...
What did you have to let go of in order to take the leap to move forward?
As I mentioned before, my self- identity teetered on what other people thought of me. I had a deep-seeded fear of not being liked or accepted. I did things differently, but only to the point that others approved of and admired. I never dared to step outside of the status quo long enough to be criticized. So for me, I had to stop believing that other people’s opinion of me mattered. I had to stop listening to the people around me that told me I was doing it right and take a long, hard, look for myself. I had to re-connect with my husband and my family- which was scary, because well, they only knew a wife and a mom who was partially present. I had to start paying attention to the things that mattered and somehow figure out exactly WHAT those things were! I had lived a life dependent on the opinions of others so long, I had inadvertently disabled my "think for myself" part of my brain. So I had to dig deep into my heart for the answers.
What did you find on the other side of fear that made it worth it?
After taking the leap and choosing to follow Jessica's lead and mentorship, I started a business with a direct sales company called AdvoCare. I wanted another baby and after some soul searching I knew I didn't want to hand yet another infant over to someone else to raise. I wanted to do it. Being present in the lives of my children and my husband quickly went from being the least to the most important of my priorities. Jessica wasn't a counselor, she was a leader- she led a tribe of people who wanted more out of life than what the world dictated they could have. And THAT was what attracted me. I was freed from worrying about what others thought of me and given permission to dream as BIG as I could. And so I did. We locked arms and ran without looking back or to the side until October 7, 2015 when my third baby, a girl named Elyza entered the world. Because I was willing to let go of my fear, admit that I did NOT have all the answers, and that I wasn't "special" to anyone in my career world- I found freedom and a vehicle to make my dreams become reality. I didn't have maternity leave- a side effect of having a career dominated by 98% being made up of males that didn't believe there was a "need" to have time off to deliver or bond with a baby. So, with eight months of hard work behind me, a newborn, and a new outlook on life, WE (my husband Jeff and I had become the unit God designed marriage for) decided to take the leap and on the ride home from the hospital, I resigned my position to become a work-from- home mama. I have since devoted my time to my God, my family, and helping others live to the potential they were created for. There has not been one single day of regret since. I don't want to leave a distorted view of my life either. While I would have to write a book to tell you the whole, juicy story with all the details of the roller coaster ride it has been, that’s not what’s actually happening. SO, just know that things were not all roses and cherries the last nearly 4 years. But nothing ever worth doing was easy.
What would you tell someone (or your former self) who still feels held back by fear or self-doubt?
Over the last 3.5 years, I've followed the lead of Jessica and many others who have proven the success system through Advocare and I have been give the gift of being able to lead many to healthy lifestyle and a free way to dream again. I've found my calling- the reason that God created me and there's still so much to come. I invite others regularly to visit my home and we spend some time dreaming together. On occasions, someone feels the same calling on their life and I have the privilege to run alongside them as they let go of the fear and doubt that has gripped their lives for far too long. When you invite someone into your space, you are vulnerable. It’s always scary to let down your guard and show people what you believe. BUT, on the chance that someone can be that lost, shallow, selfish woman I was one minute, and completely changed the next...I do it. I share my heart...beating in my chest with no walls or protection. Here I am....if this is what you desire, I will help you achieve it. Sometimes we start small and it snowballs, and others fizzle out quickly. But I believe with all my heart that we are created for more than what the world tells us. I believe that God plants those seeds in us and they lie dormant until we decide to water them or until we become too broke, busted and disgusted with our lives that change is mandatory. I will always tell people to think back to when the world was at their fingertips and dream again. I also believe that there is no greater joy and nothing that brings glory to our creator more than us living to the potential and being transformed into what He created us for.
Is there anything else you would like to share?
Always....If not you, then who? Who is going to have the power to change the things you can no longer live with in your life? Who is going to provide the things you do not want to go another day living without? WHO is going to decide what you can be or what you can become? Tell yourself, "If it is to be...it is up to me."
If not now, when? We live our lives not the basis that there is always tomorrow. That we have unlimited amounts of time to accomplish those things we said we would and that the right time will eventually come. All of these thoughts sound like "Yes." We convince ourselves that "someday..." or "I really want to..." or "I'll be able to after I...." are not saying no to our dreams. BUT, that is not the truth. Unless you are taking daily steps NOW to further your dreams, you're not accomplishing them and your “someday” will go to the grave with you. Your seeds that God himself placed inside of you will never get watered and you will live a life that ends without ever reaching the potential you were designed for. YOU are better than that...YOU can decide now, that YOU will take responsibility for your dreams and get into action to DO something about it. Imagine how it will feel, imagine in great detail, WRITE IT DOWN. Wake up and chase what you dream of like a 500 lb lion is after you! BE the one who is different and dares to dream.
